Will God provide for me?
Nehemiah Chee // April 2, 2019, 4:32 pm
Recently, during one of my weekly cell group sessions, we shared openly about our struggles and worries.
We were supposed to share how we were seeing God move in our lives and what we were thankful for. I took a piece of paper and started taking down what was shared. I tried my best to take down every detail.
But when I looked through the paper, even though I had recorded the thanksgivings shared – all I really focused on were the problems, worries and struggles.
Maybe I’m a pessimist, but I’m sure you’ve also experienced what it’s like to feel overwhelmed in the midst of uncertainties, struggles and worries – the only thing that comes to mind then is how massive the problems are.
As a full-time church worker fresh out of university, I struggled a lot whenever I thought about finances.
It only got worse when I started to plan for my future, thinking of how to pay for things like a house or my wedding. I kept asking myself: Will God provide for me?
The day God spoke to me about this financial anxiety was the day I struggled the most. As I travelled to church, I was complaining and ranting – questioning again God’s call for me to be a full-time ministry worker.
Do not worry about tomorrow.
As I walked to the church, I noticed there was a new banner that hung outside. It was so huge that I couldn’t miss it. It read: “Do not worry about tomorrow. Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns and yet your Heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?” (Matthew 6:26).
Am I not more valuable than they? I stood there, stunned by the banner. I knew that verse and had read it countless times in the Bible. It wasn’t something new. I knew that God was the Provider, my Heavenly Father who guides me.
I knew these things in my head, but they felt so unfamiliar in that moment. Days passed, and I continued to struggle with the issue of finances, walking past the banner and reading that same verse with that same unfamiliarity over and over again.
Would God provide for me?
Until I finally realised one day, that the reason why I felt unfamiliar with God and His promises was because of my orphan spirit.
I was living like an orphan without a father, and had been far away from God when it came to the issue of finances. I felt that God wasn’t being fair, so I ended up placing all my needs before seeking Him. God had became smaller in my life, and my problems became larger and greater.
The longer I thought like this and focused on money, the more my character changed. I became someone who was stingy and calculative to my friends and family. I constantly compared myself with others. I even started to negotiate with God: “Since I’m already working in Your house, should I still give my tithes and offering? I’m already earning less than my peers!”
Things got so bad to the point that I even began to doubt that God had called me to enter full-time ministry and that He would provide for me.
I finally realised that what we focus on determines our identity and character.
I had held my magnifying glass over the wrong things in my life. A magnifying glass helps you to zoom in on a selected area – it makes one thing larger than the other things. My problem was that I had placed the magnifying glass over my struggles, and naturally, all the good things in my life fell out of focus over time.
My turning point was when I started to meditate on God’s Word and His promises. My magnifying glass should be placed on His Word. Struggling with finances? God’s Word says: “Do not worry about your life” (Matthew 6:25). Struggling with loving someone? God’s Word says: “Love is patient and kind” (1 Corinthians 13:4-5).
The Bible has the answers to the questions of this life.
As I learnt to focus on what God is doing in my life, I began to see His hand more and more clearly.
I’ve been reacquainted with Him and who He is. God is good. He is not far; He is near. He is my friend, my Father, my Comforter and He provides for me. He loves me and calls me His own – and He offers this same love to you too.
Don’t underestimate the power of negative thoughts, grumbling and complaining in your mind. We must take captive such thoughts and give them over to God.
Even the smallest coin could block the sun if you placed it over your eyes. Yet the sun is infinitely larger than the coin. Similarly, what seems like a small issue could mar your view of the Son of God.
Even the smallest coin could block the sun if you placed it over your eyes.
Lastly, I learnt to focus on the reward rather than the cost. If we only care about the cost, we risk missing out on receiving our reward. As followers of Christ, there will always be costs to pay and a cross for us to carry. Mine in this season has to do with finances, but my reward is simply having the privilege to do what God has called me to do.
The Heavenly Father’s cost was having His only Son hang on the cross. Jesus’ cost was having to die the worst death of all time. The reward, however, was the eternal victory over death – life for mankind.
I think that if God had chosen only to focus on the cost, the result would be drastically different.
What are you struggling with today? You can either look to God or focus on the problems.
But whenever you struggle in life, seek Him with all your heart and you will find Him (Jeremiah 29:13). God will take you through the storms of your life (Mark 4:39, Luke 8:35) and He will guide you through the darkest valley (Psalm 23:4).
All we need to do is take His hand and follow.
THINK & TALK
- What is the condition of your heart towards finances?
- What are some promises you can stand on when it comes to provision?
- Is God truly Lord over your life? Pray for it to be so, and submit yourself to Him.